I wish I had something cute or snappy to say...but I don't. As expected, we did not receive good news today. Dad had a bad night last night, with a lot of back pain (he has been relatively pain-free thus far, so that was a bad sign). And the sores in his throat from the thrush are still very painful for him. My mom is exhausted, between Dad and her mother, and although I haven't spoken to her yet (I got this news from my sister), I am sure she is essentially just numb from everything.
The CAT scan showed a little bit of shrinkage on some of the tumors in the abdominal lymph nodes, but the liver is still mottled with cancerous lesions, the largest of which is about an inch and a quarter in size. What we don't understand is why his liver function is still so good. Apparently it should not be by this point. Dad's oncologist is going to call another doctor in Nashville, and Dad said if that doctor is interested in seeing him, he will go. There is also the option of starting a course of a different chemotherapy drug (Dad hasn't decided on that yet), but apparently we are looking at 3-6 months now, new chemo or not (I'm assuming the only purpose of new chemo would be to improve quality of life, but I'm not sure at this point).
Naturally, we are all completely broken about this development. It is not as though we expected him to go in and have the doctor say, "See you in twenty years; you're cured!" But it's difficult to have the time whittled down in such a concrete way. I think of all the plans Dad had for Dan and all the things he wanted to do in his retirement and it is heart-breaking to know that those things are (most likely) not to be. I wanted Dad to take Dan deep-sea fishing with Uncle Wyatt (and even though Mark promises that he and Danny will take Dan out on the boat with Uncle Wyatt, it won't be the same without Daddy there, too). Dad bought Dan a lifetime Tennessee sportsman's license for his third day, and Mark had looked forward to the three of them getting to teach Dan to hunt and fish. Now that will be his job alone--with perhaps some help from Danny and Uncle Wyatt.
Things continue to go downhill for my grandmother, so please pray for peace and understanding for everyone at this difficult time. This has been, by far, the darkest season of our lives. It makes clear the difference between what is important and what is petty, but my, what a way to learn such a lesson.
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As we all consider our circumstances or that of others, the Bible says, the angel of the Lord encamps all around those who fear Him and delivers them (Psalm 34:7). So every single one of His children is encircled by the presence of Almighty God! Charles Stanley wrote, this means that literally every test or trial, whether it is in our jobs, finances, families, or health, whatever it may be-has to happen in the presence of our loving heavenly Father. He has allowed it. That’s the only way. He is in everything.
We continue to pray.
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